Covey would say “begin with the end in my mind”. As I moved through my life, I increasingly used this process. What did I want my relationship to be with my children, spouse, family, and friends? Then, I conduct myself accordingly, working towards my ideal outcome. Health – same thing. Contributions – same thing. As I did not come from any kind of financial prosperity, I eventually discovered that I needed to develop a lifestyle business. One that would provide not just now, but long into the future, hopefully for generations. One with ample free time (for family, exercise, learning, contributions, etc.) It would need to be simple, have a long financial runway, be indexed for inflation, and taxed favorably. Eventually we developed a portfolio of quality single family homes and self storage. It’s not mailbox money, but can grow throughout a lifetime and has worked wonderfully. No commute, no office politics, much more control, robust, and has provided a comfortable living with various types of freedom. It will take work and time, but can work wonderfully to supplement a traditional job (or can turn into a full time job). The point is, before you just follow the crowd, put some thought into where you want to arrive and how you’ll get there. Watching my father slowly die over a three year period, I saw regret, anger, self-loathing, frustration, plus other negative emotions. Plan your life so that at the end, it is not one of regret. 

“Our goal is not to try to become rich quickly. It’s resilient wealth creation.” – Matthew McLennan

To me, that means wealth in all forms – time, money, emotional freedom, contribution to the greater good, positive uplifting relationships, and vigorous health.

Most people think of investing as difficult, time consuming, stressful, and complicated.  All the frantic activity most people envision with investing is actually just detrimental noise. Whip-sawing emotions, frequent trading, fees, more taxes, time consuming deep dives  researching multiple companies will only set you up to fail. Most active investors and mutual fund managers cannot constantly beat a simple index fund.

My way of investing is to not play where I don’t have an advantage. For decades, most of my investing decisions could be counted on one hand – buy an index fund, buy more Berkshire Hathaway, build more storage units, or buy one to three quality single family rental homes. That’s it. All will work well enough for my goals. Combined, they have worked great. They have minimized taxes, have long financial runways, are low stress, and have proven to win the long game as I live and enjoy life. The lesson – do something, but don’t make it harder than it needs to be.

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”  ~ Aldous Huxley

The easy answer is maybe a little bad luck but mostly poor decisions. Why do these poor decisions keep occuring? I believe we can literally become addicted to making bad decisions. Allow me to explain. All of us have observed good, intelligent people make the same type of mistake over and over. We’ve seen people that seem to find drama in their lives everywhere they turn whether it’s at work, home, neighbors and so on.  We’ve all seen the OCD kick in as people replay a negative event, torturing themselves with the negative emotions again and again. 

Here’s what I believe is a part of what’s going on and why it can be so difficult to break the cycle. We’ve become, in a way, addicted to the adrenaline, cortisol, and other drugs our body produces in high-stress situations. Our bodies crave this consistency and we subconsciously place ourselves in situations so we can get our fix. In some ways, our body functions as a pharmacy. This can be especially challenging to recognize and stop if you grew up in a very dysfunctional environment. 

Knowledge is power, and in most cases, your life can be dramatically improved. It will require awareness and a serious commitment to continually redirect your thoughts and actions into positive, stable, and steady paths. Brene Brown has some great reading resources along with podcasts to help begin redirecting your life.

“Doing more of what doesn’t work won’t make it work any better.” 

 ~ Charles Givens

“We should not moor a ship with one anchor, or our life with one hope.” 

 ~ Epictetus

Just that phrase, “A big fish in a small pond,” has negative connotations. It’s typically aimed at someone as a critical or insulting remark. Maybe we should rethink that position. 

Life is about experiences, and in many ways, a small pond allows for more of those experiences. There is simply less competition on the playing field in a small pond, so you get to try more things. Here’s a list of a few roles either myself or my wife has played in our small pond. Conductor of the town band, school board member, hospital foundation board member, mayor, sheltered workshop board member, starter of small businesses, and subdivision developer. Had we lived in a city of 900,000 instead of 9,000, it’s unlikely that we would have had this many different and varied experiences. Each of these opportunities has taught us much and we’re better for them.

No one can have or be on a huge scale without sacrifice and trade off. Great political leaders, mega-wealthy individuals, a top salesperson means for many that something else was sacrificed (possibilities include time, family, health, or marriage). 

We are a size-possessed culture and constantly comparing ourselves to others. True success means setting boundaries then living accordingly. That is success and a happier life. What on the surface may seem more mediocre can actually be your best life. Do your own thinking. So, the next time you’re critical of yourself for not playing in the “big leagues”, remind yourself that size is not everything. For me, it’s about varied experiences, having time for loved ones, and the opportunity to get a life. If this chapter speaks to you, read “David and Goliath” by Malcolm Gladwell. His insight and conclusion are both amazing and helpful.

“Don’t worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition.”  ~ Abraham Lincoln

“With self discipline most anything is possible.”  ~ Theodore Roosevelt

Why are there so few truly successful people? I’m not just talking in financial terms, but also in relationships, health, contributions to the greater good, and many other aspects of life. In the majority of cases, it really comes down to this. You’ve got to really want things to change.

Change begins with self-education. For example, if you want to have a healthier body then educate yourself on the many methods of doing so, the advantages and disadvantages of each. At the touch of our fingertips we can ask our search engines for expert advice, read research articles, watch you tube videos for examples of how to gain quadricep strength, stretching or yoga programs. 

We can conveniently listen to content regarding financial advice, how to become a real estate investor, religious guidance or the priceless wisdom of millions of ordinary people who have overcome struggles and are living their best lives.

Every bookstore and library has a self-improvement section, plus other sections with all the information you need. Few people buy the books, fewer finish the book, fewer still implement the changes, and finally, even fewer make their changes a lifelong habit.

The research you do and a plan in place are wonderful, but the actual work and follow through MUST be done. Procrastination, allowing for unnecessary distractions, not feeling “into it” today, are only some of the excuses that will tempt you to derail your goals. Like Theodore Roosevelt said, “With self discipline most anything is possible.” Write that out and place it somewhere that it must be seen by you every. single. day.  

Cervantes said, “The joy is in the journey.” Don’t be like most people, just getting through the day. Decide NOW that you really want things to change, then go to work making it happen. It will be challenging, your success curve will be erratic, there will be set-backs, but at the end of the day, you absolutely, positively can build a much better life. The big question is, “Do you really want things to change?”

“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure… than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.”  ~ Theodore Roosevelt

“Learn, do, teach.” ~ Unknown

This blog is, in essence, my ethical will. It’s what I believe and what I have learned, many times the painful, hard way. I want my grandchildren and great-grandchildren to have a better life. This blog is one of my contributions toward that effort. Sure, I’ll publish and attempt to market this product helping others as well, but it’s just as much my attempt to improve the lives of future generations of my family.

As we move through life, we accumulate knowledge. My advice is to take that knowledge and write your ethical will – hopefully improving the lives of family members, some that haven’t even been born yet. Do you have wisdom that should be shared? If so, consider writing it down. It’s never too late to begin the process of creating your ethical will.

“Ignorance is NOT bliss. Ignorance is poverty, ignorance is devastation. Ignorance is tragedy. And ignorance is illness. It all stems from ignorance.”  ~ Jim Rohn

“Does thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that’s the stuff life is made of.” 

~ Benjamin Franklin

Making the most out of your life means making the necessary adjustments to work more efficiently (smarter, not harder). One of the tools I use is my yearly planner (my choice is the “Time Traveler”) which travels with me. Daily tasks, errands, family responsibilities, appointments, payments, birthdays, anniversaries, all are written in the planner. 

People are notorious for missing appointments and commitments. How many times has a physician, dentist or optometrist called, text or emailed you an appointment reminder? They’ve found people irresponsible and distracted. Missed appointments may damage your reputation with labels like ‘undependable’, ‘irresponsible’, ‘can’t cut it’, or even a mild version of ‘dishonest’ (you made a commitment, but didn’t keep it). In addition, it sends the message that you don’t consider the appointment or the people involved as important, and are willing to inconvenience them.

Those people with an excellent reputation stand out from the crowd, and effective use of your planner helps you be that “standout” person. “Standout” people are increasingly rare, which means you may get noticed quicker and that results in opportunities.

There’s a second and equally compelling reason to work your planner. It’s a great way to save mental energy. When ideas, reminders, appointments, etc. are entered in the planner, you can simply forget about them and focus on other things. Periodic checks in the planner tell you what’s coming and what needs done. If you’re going to move beyond average, this is another must. Being effective with your time, managing your energy, and keeping your commitments are all a must in getting a life. 

To further enhance my effectiveness with my planner, I carry it in a leather folder. In the folder is additional business information that is used on a daily basis – colored pens, mechanical pencils, post-it notes, and a tablet to write phone and other messages on. A cell phone, call forwarding, and my leather case give me tremendous freedom to be away from the office yet still produce business. It has put huge blocks of time back into my personal life. 

Planners are offered on smartphones, tablets, and laptops as well. These devices travel with us, and are built to make life more convenient and efficient. One of the nice things about these electronics is that you can set audible and visual alarm reminders for important appointments, payments, anniversaries and the list goes on. Use these tools to your advantage!

Decide today if you’re serious about your commitments and getting a life. Get a planner, work it, and keep working it. 

“What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself.”  ~ Abraham Lincoln

“Don’t let the wake drive the boat.”  ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

Most of us want to feel like we earned our own success. No lucky breaks, no connections, just hard work, brains, and our skill. Get over it, because it’s just not true. Picture yourself born in Bangladesh in poverty. We’ll see how successful you are and how good life is to you. Globally speaking, if you were born in the United States, you’ve already won the ovarian lottery. There are more opportunities for the masses than anywhere else on earth. You did nothing to deserve it, but things worked out and you now have a chance at a better life. Your job is to take whatever hand you were dealt and then strive to play the cards in the best way possible. 

ALL of us have had people trying to help us (parents or other family members, teachers, friends, or mentors) at some point in our lives. Some people may have been born into families that value education, have wealth, and are politically connected. Others have the reverse. 

The point is – don’t feel guilty about utilizing your resources. Rather, view the resources as opportunities, be grateful for your good fortune, and then simply demand yourself to build the best life you can. I’ve known people that came from some affluence that set themselves up to fail with their attitude. If they succeeded, it was because they inherited or got a start in some way, so they weren’t really a winner. If they failed, they were really a loser, because they had a start then blew it. 

Whether you began with nothing, a little, or a lot, get over it. We are all spending a non-renewable resource (our time and life). Setting yourself up to fail or making things harder than they need to be only positions you for another high reading on the dumb-ass meter. 

Under the best of circumstances, with the wind at your back and downhill, life is hard. No one gets a free pass on easy street. I did not make it on my own. I had different forms of help from grandparents, my aunt, parents, siblings, and a mentor, among others. Yes, I had to do the work, but without them, my current success level would not have been possible. So learn to celebrate your resources, and as you travel this journey, don’t forget to give back.

“I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstances, but by our disposition.”  ~ Martha Washington

“Courtesy is as much a mark of a gentleman as courage.” 

 ~ Theodore Roosevelt

When I was growing up, I frequently heard the phrase “you can’t let people walk on you”. I eventually got into the family business where that mentality continued. We used to joke that my father was in charge of the public relations side of our business. You wouldn’t find his picture in the warm, cuddly section.

It took me years to finally get a handle on the challenges of human interaction. Very seldom does an ‘in your face’ confrontation produce good, long term results, and anything less than that is not letting people walk on you. I’d like to share some advice after having spent decades working with people, money, and stressful situations.

1. When things are boiling, expect some steam to be vented. While unpleasant when you’re on the receiving end, simply view it as something necessary to move towards a solution. People need to let the emotion out so they can become more rational and reasonable. All of us have shown the red eye and made a complete ass out of ourselves at some point. The person that can remain calm during one of these barrages, continue to think clearly, diffuse the situation, then move towards a solution has a very valuable skill set.

2. Find a way to let people save face. Humans have a way of getting themselves backed into a corner. If you can find ways to let them out of the corner and salvage their dignity, you can go far.

3. Don’t go down the rabbit path. As people become entrenched in their positions, the excuses to justify those positions start surfacing. This redirects the conversation, confuses the issues, wearing everyone out until finally things just die from exhaustion. Don’t go down these rabbit paths – stay focused on the big picture.

4. You may be working with someone you don’t have a high regard for. (Think belligerent personality with an IQ just above plant life.) Don’t let it get personal. Don’t insult them, and let any comments directed toward you roll right off. Just get the job done then get out of there.

These are easier said than done. However, if you can master them, you’ll have a formidable set of arrows in your quiver. There will always be challenging personalities, but the person who can successfully work with them can go quite far in life. 

“The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people.”  ~ Theodore Roosevelt

For many Americans taxes are their largest expense. We pay sales, property, social security, state, and federal taxes among others. It chews up a significant portion of our income and squeezes us to find money for other needs and wants. 

Since it’s a major expense, time spent learning about tax management and the law can serve us and our wallets well. Remembering that tax law is extremely complicated and a large cut in your take-home pay, perhaps you should consider whether you do your own taxes or hire a tax accountant. If audited, are you prepared to lock horns with the IRS or would you rather the tax accountant deal with the headaches?

Allow me to share my method. I hired a full-time professional with extensive experience in my area of work, which is real estate. It takes approximately eight hours to work through the process (four- two hour sessions). During those sessions, I ask questions, run different ideas or strategies by him, and in general, send myself to school on different ways to run my businesses. It has made a significant impact in finding ways to legally keep more of my money instead of sending it into that sinkhole we call the federal government. You’ll still have to pay, but not more than legally required. In addition, my accountant has been exposed to lots of various businesses, so his insight and advice are extremely valuable. 

Whether you’re a business owner or not, a tax accountant is knowledgeable regarding tax law and recent changes which may benefit you. This can translate into more money in your pocket which is a key to getting a life.